It Takes a Village...

After completing several online collaborations with my elementary and teen students, I decided to take on a new challenge—mentoring a duet for my early years group. These two young musicians had both started their journey with another studio/teacher, so helping them “unlearn” certain habits and build new ones together has been an exciting (and sometimes tricky) process.

For this performance, our main goal was simple but meaningful: learn to play together by tuning in to each other’s steady (or sometimes changing) pulse. Without a conductor, metronome, or teacher standing beside them, they would have to rely on one important skill—listening—to keep the music flowing in sync.

As we worked together, I found myself asking:

• How can I help these young kids feel confident and coordinated as a team?

• How can I teach them to support each other so the music continues, even if one of them stumbles?

• How can parents play an active role in supporting their children’s musical performances?

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Every rehearsal brought small wins, new discoveries, and a lot of laughter. And that’s the beauty of making music together, it’s not just about playing the right notes but about learning to listen, connect, and respond to the person right next to you.

Even in face-to-face music practices and performances, playing with a steady pulse doesn’t come easily for most students. It takes a great deal of sensitivity and self-control to align one’s part with another’s. I often tell parents: it’s like giving a young child an ice cream and asking them to just look at it without taking a bite. The temptation to rush ahead (or slow down) is real! All throughout a performance, each child needs to keep checking and adjusting their own pace, listening carefully, and responding in ways that support their partner so they can finish the piece together and finish it well.

At home, the process can start simply. Practicing at a set speed with a metronome can help build a steady pulse. Listening to recorded parts of the music also gives children a “big picture” perspective, helping them weave their own part into the layers of sound. Over time, their ears become more attuned to hearing not just themselves but the entire musical conversation.

An essential part of good musicianship is learning to embrace mistakes—and respond to them in the moment so the music (and their partner) keeps going. Many students have a natural instinct to stop and restart from a “safe” section they know well. This is a common habit called motor memory, but it can limit their ability to rejoin at any point in the music. That’s why, in our rehearsals, we even practice making mistakes. It’s a skill in itself—accepting them, moving forward, and keeping the music alive.

I am deeply grateful for my parent community, who invest not only their resources but also their trust in giving their children opportunities like music. Parents are not just “enrollers” or “practice reminders.” They are partners. True involvement goes beyond paying tuition or making sure a child practices; it’s about showing them that what they’re doing matters. A parent doesn’t need to be a musician to offer this kind of support. Sometimes, the most powerful message you can send is simply sitting beside your child for a few minutes while they play, letting them know you see them, hear them, and value their effort.

Because beyond the beauty of any performance lie the values we all hope for our children: persistence, discipline, and self-confidence. These qualities are not built in isolation, but they grow stronger with the help of a caring village that shows children how they can achieve their goals and reminds them why the journey is worth it.